Yesterday, the Central Intelligence Agency broke the world record for worst excuse ever recorded when it claimed that it had destroyed interrogation tapes in 2005 to protect them from being leaked. They claimed they feared that keeping the tapes would result in the interrogators being vulnerable to attacks from Al Quada. The record breaking performance, which suprassed then 6 year-old Billy Johnson's 1913 claim that his dog ate his homework, ignored several obvious problems with the excuse that would have been obvious to...well a 6 year old. Among them, according to local grade schooler, Krystal Smith, was that "couldn't the CIA have destroyed all but one tape and kept that one in a safe or something...I mean you're telling me that the CIA doesn't think it can hold such a basic secret?," and "It is obvious that the tapes were destroyed because the interrogators were using illegal torture methods, as has been widely reported. There is absolutely no plausible reason to legally destroy those tapes" This is all not to mention, 3 year-old Thomas Somoza's point, "doesn't Al Quada have like a million people already on its list. It's not like the one thing stopping them from killing people is video evidence."
An outstanding performance.
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